I'm such a bad blogger.

It's true.

I'm a terrible blogger.

I don't go to cool blog conferences.

I don't have a connected circle of blogs that I am a part of, and active in.

I seldom participate in link-ups.

I don't post on a regular schedule.

I almost never remember to promote my blog on any social media site, which is ok, considering I almost never remember to seek out followers on said sites.

Some weeks - or months - I'll be inspired and post nearly every day.

Other times, weeks will pass without a solid post.

I have good ideas for posts them immediately forget them.

Truthfully, I'd love to do all these things, but since blogging is something that I just do, just for me, it usually... ok, always takes a back seat to laundry and dinner and kissing boo-boos and playing outside and...

You get the picture.

So yeah, I'm a bad blogger.

Oh, and I never, ever, ever remember to check my stat counter.

Except occasionally.

A couple months ago Angie at the Jammie Girl posted an amusing look at what search terms brought people to her blog.

I thought "I should do that!" then immediately forgot all about it.

Till today.

 So today, in no particular order, I'm listing some of my favorites.  Keep in mind, these are the actual terms that some poor unsuspecting soul typed into Google or wherever hoping to get real information.

Instead they got me.

1. Pictures of a funny retail clerk:  Hmmm.  Do you think they meant "funny-looking?"  Or just funny?  Either way, I'm sure these folks were sorely disappointed.  Because I almost never post pictures of myself.  Well, except this one time.  Ok, maybe they weren't so disappointed after all.

2. Stubby toes: Ok, maybe I have overshared a little about the state of my feet, especially after a certain pair of unnamed shoes *cough* Brooks *cough* tortured me for 13 miles or so, but come on.  Stubby?  Really? That's just mean.

3. What to wear at amusement parks: Variations of this are among my top search results.  However, after many people spent time looking at this post, I'm sure amusement park ticket sales were way down.  Call me, Disneyworld.  Maybe we can work out a little... agreement.


4. Baby with hairy toes: Really, my first question here is why in the Hell would anyone want to look for that anyway?  My second question, of course, is why would that bring someone to my blog?

5. Smell my feet, or I'll step on you: This doesn't even make any sense.  I think I need a drink.

6. Little bastard kid: Hey, I was married when my kids were born! Stop being so judgey.

7. Zombie feet how to make them: Run 13 miles in poorly fitting shoes.  See?  This blog is totally informational.

At this point, I just stopped looking.

And I'm seriously considering just deleting Statcounter altogether.

But if I do that, whatever will I have to blog about?

Stupid circle of life and all that.