7/04/2013

How to install a ceiling fan in 10 easy steps!




1. Decide you need a ceiling fan in your library/office.
2. Find the cutest, funkiest ceiling fan in the history of ceiling fans and decide it must be yours. BECAUSE IT IS SO AWESOME.
3. Gift your ceiling fan of choice to your hubby for Father's Day, with absolutely no ulterior motive, other than you really want it and this totally justifies buying it AND it takes care of buying a Father's Day gift.  That's called two birds, one stone, baby. 
4. Cajole/guilt your hubby into agreeing to install it while you sit on your ass, "assisting" by reading the directions and/or a People magazine from March.
5. Send your hubby on several trips to Lowe's for supplies you find out you don't actually need, once you pay attention to the directions you are supposed to be in charge of.  Oops.
6. Occasionally yell things like "Don't shock yourself!" and "Be careful, honey!" for dramatic effect and to make it seem like you are helping.  Which you totally are.  It's called MORAL SUPPORT. 
7. When your hubby asks you questions like "Ok, what now?" look confused and hand him the directions, mumbling things like "Electricity scares me," and "Well, this part you need to actually SEE yourself."
8. Ignore your children and all your children's demands for 2+ hours.  After all, you are busy "helping" install a ceiling fan.  This thing won't install itself, for goodness sake.  
9. Drink a beer.  Or two.  Or three.  This is HARD work, people.  Then remember to offer a drink of water to your hubby, but save the beer for yourself.  Bare electrical wires and alcohol do not mix, after all, and SAFETY FIRST, PEOPLE!
10. Sit back, relax, and admire and enjoy all the fruits of your hard, hard labor.  This ceiling fan business was a breeze ;)

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12 comments:

  1. I LOOOOVE that ceiling fan!!! Is it from Lowe's as well?

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    1. It was from Lowe's, but it was a special order item, so I just ordered it from lowes.com. Seriously, ceiling fans are usually ugly, but isn't this one amazing?!!?!!

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  2. THAT CEILING FAN IS AWESOME! Can you send your husband over to install the one for me that's been sitting, still in the box, in my room for nearly a year? I married Mr. Badwrench....

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    1. Dyanne, I will certainly send him your way, right after he finishes my current honey-do list, which includes sanding the back deck, pressure washing the house, pulling up the carpet on the stairs, tiling the backsplash in the kitchen... You should see him sometime in 2026 ;)

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    1. It is - quite possibly - the best ceiling fan in the entire world. Or at least the best one I've ever seen :)

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  4. You did an amazing job on this! I can't believe your children would pester you while you studied to make sure it turned out perfect. YOU NEED A VACATION!

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    1. Yes! A vacation! I'll leave today! Can you watch my kids while I'm gone?

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  5. That is an amazing ceiling fan. Every time on Trading Spaces when the designer would declare that the ugly ceiling fan simply had to go, I'd think, "Dumbass, you're a designer. People in Texas NEED ceiling fans. Find one that's less ugly." But they never did. The neighbors would just make them keep the old one.

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    1. I totally used to throw things at the screen and scream at Genevieve every time she tried to take a ceiling fan down. That reminds me that I love that show. Is it even still on? But really, they are a necessary evil anywhere it gets over say, 75 degrees.

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