On This, The Eve Of My 36th Birthday.

I don't do New Year's Resolutions.

There are many reasons.

Mainly, as I have mentioned before, I am a retail clerk, and the week between Christmas and New Year's is something like the Clampetts meet Suze Orman meets a Twilight convention.  Really.  So by the time I get to New Year's, it's about all I can do to drag myself to the kegerator.

I'm certainly in no position to make any sort of long-term plans.

Plus, I'm not so good with the follow-through.  But that's a post for another day.  Of course, you probably won't ever see that particular post, because did I mention that I'm not so good with the follow-through?

Anyway, that brings me to my current topic, which is my birthday.  Which is tomorrow.  Which will make me somewhere closer to 40 than to 30.

Usually, I use my birthday as a time for self recrimination and flagellation reflection.  It's close enough to the new year that I can still feel in the loop when people are talking about their resolutions.

In the past, I have made the same sort of unattainable goals as everyone else - I'll write something every day, grow my hair, cut my hair, lose 20 pounds, exercise more, eat better, manage my money better, spend more time with my family, spend more time with myself... you know how this goes.

But this year, I can't think of one damn thing to do better/more/differently.

I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.  Either 1) I'm so fulfilled I can't think of one thing to change or 2) I'm so numb and apathetic to my life I don't care.

So on this, the eve of my 36th birthday, I am content.  I have Blue Moon draft in hand, I can hear my boys rumpusing in the next room, and I have the next couple of days off from work, with absolutely no plans.

Sounds like a winner to me.