The Obligatory Fall/Halloween Post

Hope yours was great!

Not your Mother's guacamole. Unless your Mother makes really awesome guacamole. Then I guess it's possible.

(Note: This was not intended to be a food blog.  When I started this blog way back when, that was not my intention.  However, I love to cook.  And my official Google research shows that recipe blogs are among the most visited, right after the kinky sex blogs.  And that ain't gonna happen. So eat some guacamole and keep your mind out of the gutter.)

Good, I mean REALLY GOOD, guacamole is difficult to find.  I once spent an entire summer traveling from Mexican restaurant to Mexican restaurant in search of guacamole that wasn't runny, or brown, or bad.  Actually, I didn't do that.  Whatever.  But I love guacamole, and since avocados are about $12 each right now, you can't afford to make a bad batch.

WHAT YOU NEED:
5-6 ripe avocados (They will feel slightly squishy, but not mushy.  Yes, there is a difference.)
4 Roma tomatoes
1 small red onion
salt & pepper
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
juice from 1/2 lemon

WHAT YOU DO:
Halve the avocados, take the pit out, and scoop the good part out into a bowl.  Dice the tomatoes very finely, toss 'em in the same bowl.  Chop the onion.  I like big pieces, but if you're not so much on the onion flavor, you can chop 'em up tiny.  Add salt, pepper, cayenne and lemon juice.  Then, take your potato masher and go to town.  Smush it all up good, until it is the consistency you like.  That's it.  You're done.

Seriously?

Several months ago, I made a purchase using a credit card.  Being the fiscally, financially responsible person that I am, I paid it off, in full, as soon as the bill arrived.  However, being the often drunk person that I am, I overpaid the credit card company by $.23.  Why $.23?  Who knows, but that's what happened.  It was totally a mistake on my part, I must have looked at some numbers wrong, anyway, MY mistake is not the point here...

The next month, I received a nicely worded letter from the credit card company:

Dear MJ at 154 Hidden Court,

It appears as though you have overpaid us on your last credit card bill.  We show a balance of $.23 on your account.  We would like to encourage you to make a purchase in order to negate this balance.  If you are unable to spend this credit within six months, a check will be mailed to you.

Sincerely,

Your Credit Card Company

Months passed.  Every month, a new envelope came, each with an increasingly stronger worded letter.

Month three:

Dear MJ at 154 Hidden Court,

Listen, you still have a $.23 credit on your account.  Couldn't you just BUY something?  I know we are in a financial recession, but don't you need some new shoes or something?  Maybe a nice Prada bag?  You could save us all a lot of trouble if you would just spend the money, ok?

Sincerely, 

Your Credit Card Company

Month five:

Listen up, and listen good,

I'm not even sure we have a checking account here.  You need to SPEND THIS FREAKING MONEY NOW.  I'm not sure what will happen if you don't.  No one, and I mean no one, had ever had a CREDIT on her account before.  Nobody knows what to do.  You have one month to comply.

Sincerely,

Your Credit Card Company

Month six,  the check for $.23 arrived, as threatened promised.  

Postage - $.44.

What I did with the other half of the chicken.

You may remember from my post the other day that I used part of a rotisserie chicken to make Chicken & Dumplings.  You may not remember.  Hell, you probably didn't even read it.  Whatever.  But, anyhoo, I'm always looking for something good to make, and I love me some quesadillas.

WHAT YOU NEED:

Part of a rotisserie chicken (about half of one), pulled from the bone and chopped

some olive oil, just a bit

one small yellow onion, chopped

any veggies you want to hide from you kids.  I have used carrots, green peppers, mushrooms, squash, zucchini, and broccoli before.  Whatever you have in the fridge that looks like it's drawn its last breath, but that hasn't given up the good fight yet will do.

Shredded mexican cheese (one bag)- if you want to shred it yourself, go for it, but why would you want to?

some spices (about 1/2 teaspoon each salt, cumin, chili powder, onion powder) OR a pack of Taco Seasoning Mix

A little bit of water

6 flour tortillas  - makes 3 quesadillas

WHAT YOU DO:

In a small skillet, heat the oil, then add in the chicken, onions, and any other veggies you have.  Cook it until the onions aren't crunchy any more (just a couple of minutes).  Add in the spices, and just a touch of water to get the spices all blended up.  Cook it for another minute till it is bubbly and delicious.

In a large skillet or on a stovetop griddle (I love mine - it's the best $50 RJ ever spent - and BELIVE ME, he has spent a lot of $50es) lay out the tortillas.  Spread 1/3 of the chicken mixture out onto each tortilla, top with 1/3 of the cheese, and put another tortilla on top.  Repeat.  Repeat.  Cook it until it is starting to brown on one side, then flip it over, and cook the other side.

Yum.

Wild rumpus - $37. Going to the potty - priceless.

RJ and I decided that is was time for zj to see a real movie, in a real theatre.  So on Sunday afternoon, Aunt B (no, not THAT Aunt B) came over to sit with cj, and off we went on a stress-filled, whiney, more-trouble-than-it-was-worth magical adventure to see Where The Wild Things Are.  We arrived at the theatre, paid way too much to get in, paid way too much for popcorn, (but I did have the foresight to sneak the M&Ms in), and got good seats.  The movie started with only one trailer to watch, and the wild rumpus was on.

Since he was an itty-bitty, zj has LOVED the book, so it seems like not much of a stretch that he would also love the movie, right?  RIGHT?

About 10 minutes, he began to stage whisper, loudly, "Is it over yet?"  This reminds me of the time Aunt B & I took Mama to see Batman, but that's another story altogether...

So, anyway, about 15 minutes in, zj realized that the only way that moving around would be acceptable would be if there were a destination, if you will, in mind.

"Daddy, I have to go to the POTTY."

After several potty breaks, and approximately 1 hour into the movie, this is what happened:

Well, I enjoyed it, anyway.

So, movie over, and RJ carried zj out to the car.  While being buckled in zj woke up, and resumed his conversation mid-sentence.  To distract him, I asked him what his favorite part of the movie was.

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

"Well, I liked going to the potty."

The end.

At least he's good natured.

Apparently so.

Important update to the previous post.

Hey, remember that post I did just a minute ago in which I stated that zj was being quiet?  Yeah, this is why.

Naptime really is the new happy hour. (With apologies to the author of that book, whose title I just claimed for my own.)

Now that I have two kids, I wonder what I used to do in all my spare time.  Because I sure had a lot of spare time.  I must have, because taking care of zj and cj take up 25 hours most days, yet I still manage to find time to brush my teeth at least a couple times every week.  Ergo, before I had kids, I had a lot of free time.  I guess, because I can't really remember what I did.  When I think back on the pre-kids era, it is all a bunch of fuzzy, beer-laced memories of reading books that have - gasp - CHAPTERS!  Oh, and I used to have time to get my hair cut at least a couple times a year.  Other than that, I'm not sure what I did.

But now, with two kids under age 4, naptime and bedtime are like the next water stop for someone running a marathon.  Don't misunderstand here, I love my boys, and I love playing X-Men with zj (even if I do have to be Blob most of the time),  and I love reading them stories, and coloring, but after a few hours of it, my brain is basically mush and I look forward to the chance to think about grown up matters, like leaky roofs, draft beer and facebook.

So maybe I occasionally fudge bedtime (they can't tell time, so what if it's 5pm, Mama needs a DRINK) by a few minutes.  Who's really counting?  My kids get plenty of quality programming attention, so why should I feel bad about occasionally wanting to do something for myself, like maybe taking care of the current unibrow situation?  But I do.  Feel bad, that is (and currently have a unibrow, for that matter).

Anyway, my point here, if there really is one, is that I love naptime.  It is currently naptime at 154 Hidden Court, and cj is sleeping like, well, like a baby.  Zj is at least somewhat subdued, if not asleep, and Mama gets a chance to blog a bit.  Peaceful, ain't it?

Easy Chicken and Dumplings, AKA my own 30 Minute Meal. Take that, Rachel Ray.

Rachel Ray is all kinds of annoying, and no one  can really argue with that point.  However, over the past few years, I have learned a thing or two from her about making tasty stuff pretty quickly, and although this is MY OWN RECIPE, FROM MY OWN HEAD, I will give credit where credit is due, and the spirit, the essence, if you will, of this recipe is purely from annoying smiley lady.  Here goes:

WHAT YOU NEED:

2 boxes chicken broth or stock

1 medium onion, chopped

Some carrots, also chopped

Some celery, again, chopped

part of 1 rotisserie chicken - I prefer the ones from Kroger, but even a Wal-Mart one will do, although then you will have to go to Wal-Mart, which is all kinds of bad

Jiffy baking mix

some sort of milk or cream

sage

a bay leaf

parsley flakes, straight from that little red tin can

an itty bitty bit of olive oil

WHAT YOU DO:

In a large pot, heat the olive oil, and put the chopped onion, celery and carrot in.  Saute it for a couple minutes.  Yes, I said a couple of minutes.  I am NOT Stephen Hawking.  Just do it till it looks right.  Then pull some of the good part of the chicken off, throw it in the pot, and put in the stock and the spices.  Boil it for 10 minutes or so, or until the carrots are soft.  Meanwhile, mix the Jiffy baking mix (if you can't find that, Bisquick will do, but I think Bisquick has a funny taste) with the milk until it looks like slightly wet, lumpy biscuits.  Drop it into the boiling concoction by the spoonful, put a lid on it, and cook it for 15 more minutes or so, or until your dumplings are puffy and delightful.

Then eat it.

It's raining pee in my house. So I thought I'd make chicken and dumplings for dinner.

So, a couple of days ago, I noticed a small water spot on the ceiling in my kitchen.  Which is directly below the master bathroom (this will become an important detail later).  A few days passed, it seemed to dry up, and since we have been having monsoon-like weather, I didn't think anything else about it.  Until today, when ZJ interrupted my facebook session found me while I was folding laundry and said "Mama, it's raining in the kitching!!!"  (He has some trouble pronouncing anything that ends in the "n" sound, by the way.)  Sure enough, it was, and it was raining... pee.

Long story short, I called RJ at work, because I can't deal with plumbers, and the Plumbing Doctor will be here first thing next week.  At which point, RJ and I will have to learn how to repair our ceiling.  Good times ahead.  Below, you can see my super-fancy pee catching system:

By the way, this has absolutely nothing to do with chicken and dumplings, but that IS what's for dinner.  If I'm feeling crazy, I'll post the recipe later.

Welcome to 154 Hidden Court.

Hi. I'm MJ, and I reside at 154 Hidden Court. I'm a full time Mama, a full time wife, a full time bookstore manager, and a desperately stifled wannabe writer. You're welcome to come on in, look around, and get to know us. While you're here, just remember to watch out for the ginormous dust bunnies, and don't ever, ever look in the sofa cushions.